When you walk into a Doctor of Clinical Hypnotherapy’s office, the very first thing he/she will notice is your feet. Yep!… your feet. If your feet point straight ahead or inward (toes are pointed in slightly toward each other) you are classified for hypnotherapy purposes as an emotional suggestible. Now, understand, we are not talking about the kind of emotion that brings up feelings, tears, etc. We use this term as a psychological expression as to one’s mental and physical sensitivity. So, go for a walk, and as you walk, notice if your toes are pointing slightly inward (pigeon-toed) or outward (like a duck). If you walk and stand with your toes slightly inward (pigeon-toed), you are emotionally suggestible. If you stand and walk with your toes pointed outward (like a duck) you are physical suggestible. If the heels of your older shoes are wearing flat and even, you are emotional. If the heels of your shoes are wearing uneven, the right outside edge of the heel is worn down more than the left side of the heel, you are physical.
Okay, so what does this all mean. Buckle up, you are going to find this is a revelation about you and everyone you know plus strangers, too.
Let’s understand the emotional suggestable first. This is the person who walks with their feet pointed straight ahead or slightly inward (like a pigeon). They stand this way, too. They tend to have their legs closer together when they stand. Here are the characteristics of an emotionally suggestible person. Be prepared to have your mind blown!
THE EMOTIONAL SUGGESTIBLE FEMALE
To help you understand what you are about to read, I exaggerated a bit and embellished the behavior of these types of women so you would have a clear understanding of the emotionally suggestible female who I will refer to herein as an emmo. An emmo does not like her body messed with. She is not exactly a feelie, touchy, snuggly person. In fact, she doesn’t particularly like to be held for a long time or cuddle in bed with her significant other. After five minutes or so, she will tend to push the cuddler away complaining that person is too warm against her body.
The emotionally suggestible female doesn’t have a jealous bone in her body. If a woman is beautifully dressed, she will comment on how nicely the woman is dressed. She may like her belt, jewelry, shoes, or purse in a complementary way.
She is not easily jealous if another woman seems to be getting a bit too close to her physical suggestible male mate. That’s because physical suggestible females don’t think about sex much and therefore are not easily made jealous over it regarding their physical male mate.
Most of the time, when you touch her skin it will feel cool to lukewarm and never hot unless she has been exercising or exposed to excess heat.
She is sensitive to drafts. She gets cold easily and tends to cover up with a shawl, sweater, or light jacket even when indoors.
She tends to prefer clothing that covers most of her body. She will wear a standard length dress to or slightly below her knees. She wouldn’t be caught dead in a mini skirt unless she is looking for a mate. She will wear turtleneck sweaters and full-length sleeved blouses in the winter..
She doesn’t like to show off her body because she doesn’t want it messed with. She doesn’t like to stand out in the crowd or be noticed, so she does nothing that makes her appear noticed. Therefore, clothing is pleasant, covers up the body, and is usually in good taste so others will not pay much notice. The jewelry she wears is modest. Her earrings will be simple, nothing terribly flashy. She will use good taste. Her hair will most likely be short and well-styled. Her nails are nicely shaped and clear. Again, she doesn’t want anything on her body to appear outstanding because she does not want to be noticed because she does not want her body messed with. Her makeup will be minimal and tastefully done. This is her nature.
Think of the pleasant, nicely dressed librarian and you will have an idea as to how the typical emmo prefers to appear.
The emmo female does not think sex is love. To her sex is strictly a physiological release that she quietly enjoys only when the hormones in her body call for the urges she feels to be sexually satisfied. She can go without sex for long periods of time without much difficulty. That’s because sex does not love to an emmo. Sex is simply sex. Love tends toward maternal and caring with no sexual overtones or motivation involved. The emmos’ common sexual frequency is every 3rd day and not before then. Once again, she doesn’t want her body messed with. Therefore, she is more interested in gentle masturbation or oral sex to bring her to climax than she is in sexual intercourse which requires her to be penetrated by the male. The emmo is not into heavy-handed sex. She is more mental regarding sex than physical
When you hear or experience the woman being chased around in the bedroom by her mate, you have an emmo female being chased and a physically suggestible male doing the chasing.
For hypnotherapy purposes, the emmo can only be hypnotized with suggestions that are implied. She does not respond well to direct suggestions. She is very good at seeing the writing on the wall and reading between the lines for meaning. Therefore, to shout sleep and expect her to instantly go into hypnosis is not going to happen. However, if a suggestion is given such as, “your breathing will eventually change just slightly. When it does, you gently drift off into a beautiful hypnotic sleep. Of course, as a few minutes go by while hearing other things, her breathing will eventually change slightly and when that happens, she gently drops her head as she goes into a lovely somnambulistic state of hypnosis. This is why a hypnotherapist worth his/her salt, looks at their clients feet to determine if their client is an emmo or a physical. Once that is determined, the therapist can then use a hypnotic induction with the right suggestions that best induces the client into a hypnotic trance state
50% of all females from age 5 on up are emmos. Emmo females tend to be talkative. They like to chat with people about family, weather, and simple things. They don’t like to get into involved discussions that could be a detriment to what a person may think of them such as politics, religion, etc.
The female emmo is picked up. They do not pick their mate. Their mate picks them. Female emmos prefer physically suggestible males for mates because that type of mate tends to be a giver and protects the emmo. Emmos are takers and love to take from the physicals who love to give. When you get emotional and physical you end up with a marriage that usually works. If you get a female and a male emmo together in a marriage, the marriage usually results in a late, peaceful divorce. Meanwhile, both male and female emmo will have a replacement mate waiting in the wings for them.
The female emmo controls the sex in a relationship simply because she does need it to feel loved. So she would just as soon not have sex than have it. So, she decides when she will have sex with her physical male partner.
Female emmos are good with money. Money is their highest concern. They want to save it and keep it to protect them when needed. Money comes first, then family, then close friends, and last is the male physical in the relationship.
THE EMOTIONAL SUGGESTIBLE MALE
The emotional suggestible male (who we will call an emmo) is quite similar in tendencies to the female emmo. Most of what was said about the female emmo is applicable to the male emmo.
50% of all males are emmos. He too does not want his body messed with. He will walk and stand with his feet pointed straight ahead or slightly inward (like a pigeon). He will stand with his legs closer together. He is not into the wide stance look typical of an extremely masculine football player or a U.S. Marine. He tends to be quiet and reserved. He controls the relationship ultimately because he determnes when sex will occur. Since his physical female mate wants sex often because sex is love to her, he doesn’t feel that way and can take or leave it. So he, the emmo male, controls the relationship because he controls the frequency of sex in the relationship.
An emmo male will wear long sleeve shirts, turtle neck sweaters, lightweight dress coats, full length trousers and tend to cover up their body. They keep themselves nicely dressed, coordinated, and muted in color tones. They too wear the heels of their shoes out eveningly. They do nothing to be noticed or stand out in the crowd. They do not like their body messed with.
The male emmo’s sexual cycle is also every 3rd day at most and sex to the male emmo is for physiological release and satisfaction. It is not love, therefore they do not need sex to feel love as a physical male does. They too can go long periods of time without sex. When you hear about a sexy woman chasing her husband around in the bedroom, that husband is an emmo.
Once again, like the female emmo, the male emmo does not pick his mate. He is picked up by his mate. The male emmo is a taker and loves a physical female who is, by her nature, a giver, so those opposites make for a great long-term if not lifetime marriage. As an aside here, 50% of all marriages are between an emmo and a physical (regardless of their gender). The remaining 50% of marriages are between either two physicals or two emmos. Two physicals that marry are in bliss for the first 5 years because sex to them is love, so they have sex frequently to feel loved. However, physicals tend to dominate a relationship. And, when you have two physicals trying to be the boss in the relationship, the marriage usually gets ugly and fails. This is the primary reason why 50% of all marriages in the U.S. fail and result in a divorce.
The emmo male, for hypnotherapy purposes, like the female emmo, does not respond well to direct hypnotic suggestions. They do very well, however, with inferred suggestions. Therefore, the therapist will craft suggestions to induce a hypnotic trance by using analogies and inferences.
The best way to understand a male emmo is to think of the pipe-smoking professor. You have a well, conservatively dressed man. Nothing flashy, but clean and neat. His jacket sleeves may have leather patches on them. His watch band matches his belt… that sort of thing. He is quietly spoken and does nothing to attract attention.
Okay, now it really gets crazy
The physical suggestable Female
The physical suggestable female is what many men refer to as a cougar. Sex to them is love. Therefore, they need to have sex frequently to feel loved. They find the emmo male attractive because it allows them to be the boss (which is okay with the emmo male because he does not like to make decisions that can go back on him. So, he relishes in his mate, the physical female, making the decisions.
We will refer to the physical suggestible male and female as a physie. The physie female likes to stand out and be noticed. Many female entertainers are physies.
The physie female dominates her mate. She is a giver and loves the emmo male who is a taker. This makes for a good relationship.
The physie female dresses to look sexually attractive. She is the one that if she has it, will flaunt it (mini skirts and all). She will show her cleavage to attract attention. She is the boss and wants to make all the decisions. She is, however, not very good with money. Being a giver, she tends to overspend. And, after all, sex which is love is far more important to her than money.
The physie female is boisterous. She speaks up. If at a party someone asks what kind of pizza everyone should enjoy, she will stand up and insist on what she thinks is the best pizza. Any activity that may get her noticed is sought after. She is the one who will be driving the motorcycle and not riding on the back of it. She is aggressive. However, she does not control the relationship because she does not control the frequency of sex in the relationship in spite of her chasing her spouse around in the bedroom to have sex.
Female physies tend to be aggressive, dominant, and fun-loving extroverts. They fall madly in love with the emmo male because that opposite situation truly attracts them. They want to protect him and rule him. However, ultimately the emmo male controls the sex in the relationship which, oddly enough, keeps the relationship together as one has what the other seems to always want. They give each other what the other needs. This makes for a good marriage.
Physie females in hypnotherapy respond best to direct suggestions. They are not very good at reading between the lines or dealing with analogies. They take most everything said as literal (the way it is). As an example, if a male emmo and his wife, a female physie come into my office, and leave the door ajar, I might say to both of them, “hey, were you born in a barn?”, inferring the door should be closed. However, the female physie would say “no, I was born in a hospital” while the male emmo would say, oh, I’m sorry, and quietly close the door. The female physie took what was said literally and the male emmo took what was said as an analogy. It’s just the way their brain is wired.
All children are physies up to age 4 or 5, (rough and tumble) then, based on what the dominant parent or caretaker is, will determine how the child will grow up and be either a physie or an emmo. If the father or primary caretaker of a child is a dominant physie male and rules the roost, the children will likely evolve into being physies. However, if the emmo male or female rules the roost, then the children will grow up to be emmos. Please understand my description of these types are described to the extreme. Most physies and emmos have both characteristics but one or the other tendency will dominate. So, if you are slightly more emmo than physie, you will behave more like a emmo than a physie.
The physie female can be made jealous with little effort. She sees other females as a threat to her position with her emmo male mate. The more attractive another female appears in the presence of the physie female’s mate,, the more jealous the physie female becomes. Physie females were the ones who created the old saying, Hell hath no wrath like a woman’s scorn.
The Physical Suggestible Male
Once again, much of what was described as the physically suggestible female is also true for the physically suggestible male. The Physical Suggestable Male (which we will refer to as male physie stands and walks with their toes pointed slightly out (like a duck). The wider they point out, the more physical they are. Just think of the powerful athlete in a body contact sport with their toes pointed outboard slightly (like a duck) and you have the perfect idea of a male physie. They, too, are outspoken, dominant, want to be the boss and make all the decisions. They can be made insanely jealous and are possessive of their emmo female mate. Male physies pick their mate. They are not very good with money. Their highest priority is first the relationship with their mate, then their family, then closest friends and finally money and security rest at the bottom of their priority totem poll.
Sex is love to them and they need plenty of sex to feel love. This is a bit of a problem for them if they have an emmo female mate (which 50% of physie males have). While this opposite attracts, the physie male who needs to feel love aggressively goes after his emmo female mate for sex. The trouble is the emmo female could, most of the time, not care less about having sex. So, you have the male physie chasing his female emmo around in the bedroom. This causes conflicts and some bad feelings until both emmo and the physie are made aware of the facts you, dear reader, are now having revealed to you. Once they both know why they are the way they are and do what they do, both are far more tolerant of each other regarding their sexual disparity and manage to make the marriage work for life.
The hypnotic suggestibility of a physie male is direct. Physie males do not respond well to inferred suggestions and analogies. They best understand direct suggestions and respond only to direct suggestions to be hypnotized.
The male physie is possessive of his female emmo mate and, therefore, can become insanely jealous if another man makes any friendly moves towards his female emmo mate and she is responding to it.
Most marriage counselors and psychologists, yet alone, medical doctors are not aware of the suggestibility of either gender. If they were, they could provide counsel to save many relationships and prevent divorces and the break up of families. You, dear reader, are very fortunate that you have this information and probably see yourself as a physie or an emmo and now know why you are the way you are and do what you do in regards to your relationship with your significant other.
Dr. Robert G. Dean, Ph.D., C.Hth.
Chief Resident Clinical Hypnotherapist,
New Life Clinics Charitable Trust